Confessions and Chronicles of an Injured, Narcissistic Self Loather (or just someone who likes really long titles)
Okay, so as most of you know by now, I am a little nutty. However, this is NOT because I found myself with chills and crying during an Enrique Iglesias special nor that I actually enjoyed an entire episode of Phineas and Ferb. And much to your dismay, it is also NOT because I had a fabulous, three hour dream about Willie Nelson last night.
By the way, is he still alive because apparently he is my step dad?
Moving on, today marks three weeks post surgery and I wanted to share a little journal, a diary of sorts of a narcissistic injured self loather who I may or may not just slightly resemble.
Enjoy!
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- “Oh look, a fun tunnel! I got this cycling thing down!”
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- “What? Pouty lips work for Pamela Anderson”
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- “Maybe if I add a little frown when I hold it up, I will get more sympathy”
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- “Man, this corn on the cob sprinkled with Vicodin was an EXCELLENT idea”
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- “What if I suck the cheeks in a little then pout out?”
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- “Look! I’m dressed up today to meet the new Dr; maybe this will convince him to give me the good stuff”
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- “It worked; I got the good stuff-can you see it in my eyes?”
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- “Unfortunately, he was fresh out of herpicin”
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- “I’m pretty sure I not only look high but I’m storing food in my cheeks”
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- “Check out my serious with a sexy head tilt look”
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- “Church will be a whole lot more fun on percoset!”
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- “Close up for my fans”
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- “Time for a refill-this guys too easy”
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- “I don’t know about you, but this angle really accentuates this slings best features”
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- “I think I look a little wigged out here, what do you think? Huh, huh?”
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- “Last time I am going to be able to use Maybelline to convince this guy to hook me up”
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- “Just smile and wave with your left hand”
allpointswhole 